It's International Talk Like A Pirate Day, and I actually remembered! If you're a bilge rat who lacks the confidence to converse with arrrghh-thority, check out this handy how-to. There are even pick up lines, such as "Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?"
So don't be scurvy rogues, me hearties! Talk like a pirate today or you'll walk the plank.