Sunday, November 11, 2007

I'm Growing As A Person Here

The last few days have been challenging due to stressful unforeseen and not-so-good circumstances that I don't really want to go into in detail about just at the moment.

But!

I have weathered this Stressful Thing very well. In fact, I'm still kind of in the middle of it--it may or may not work out. I hope to know soon. But with the exception of Friday afternoon, I have stuck up my chin and grabbed my life by its (proverbial) collar and just . . . well, dealt with it. I have not been an emotional wreck. I have not been down in the dumps. Sure, the Stressful Thing is not very far from my mind at any given moment, but I have managed to enjoy myself despite my worries.

This is very unlike me. When faced with Stressful Things in the past, I would either just sort of shut down completely, or try to go through the motions but be really sad or angry or (insert appropriate emotion here) and wait on the edge for some imagined other shoe to drop on top of me. In the meantime, dozens of little things would fall through the cracks so that when I emerged from the Stressful Thing at the end, I would be way behind on things that I could have been on top of if I had only made a small effort. Yes, this would include laundry.

What I am doing now is different. I am worried very much about my Stressful Thing, but at this point, there is really not much I can do to influence the outcome. I have made peace with that. That peace has allowed me to do enjoyable and necessary things in the meantime. Sure, I'm not doing flips, but I'm not crippled either.

I am very proud of myself. Go me!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I want to be you when I grow up!!!! You are amazing!

Karen

UpsizeThis said...

I'm glad you're getting by.

When training the mind for spiritual growth with genuine intent, it is time well spent.
If you're not climbing higher up the mountain, then you're improving your skills so that you might climb tomorrow.